The worst part is the "truth" is about as bad as the perception. I can picture the press conference, now:

"No, they are not phalli. They are severed fingers."

"Oh, thanks...that's much better..."

"The Philly Phalli Phive". Genius.

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"Compassionate Conservatism"?!?! That is a stupid phrase. Conservatism is inherently compassionate. It is liberalism that is cruel for the sake of maintaining a constituency.