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thanks all for your support... i did all of the above... disconnected and took a break ... got a great rain day on the beach and me and the wife just hung out and kind of found we are taking it way too serious.. Gonna let things pan out by the July 17th the answer will be known on where my company is going .. and will go from there ... but end my week of vacation pretty thankful that i have what i have ... pretty thankful i have a great partner to negotiate life together... and as some of you said heck maybe this is a door closing so a new one can open and something better will be offered....
My dad was quite like you. He took a lot of his identity from his work. He didn't ignore us, mind you, but he was very good in the Savings and Loan business and when he got canned (for standing up to a guy who was cheating others but was a "rising star"), he took it all very personally and suffered a tail spin of mammoth proportions. Eventually, he was hired by the individual who fired him as a personal properties manager for the guy. He got to do the same kind of work but without the hassle of a daily grind or routine and no office hours at all.
I'm quite the opposite of my dad. I have lived my entire adult life wanting to be a husband and a dad which also crushed me when my first wife left me for another... but eventually, I met my current wife and we had some kids (comparatively late in my life) and I wouldn't switch positions with anyone on earth at this point (a 10 year old and a 12 year old, wife and I going on 14 years).
You remember the concept of "overlapping fields of fire" they taught us in the military? You only focus on [this] field of fire in front of you and pick off anything that enters it, regardless of what is going on in anyone else's field of fire. It was great for winning some battles, but if you never look out of your field of fire, you never see the other "kill" opportunities that are available.
It could be a new opportunity for you to do something you've always wanted to do. Cheer up though; you have your life and health. I think the beach trip is a great idea! Gives you a chance to relax, and do some quality thinking about where to next, whilst taking in the serenity.
Forget the beer. Enjoy the beach. Enjoy your wife. Take a week away from the phone and the television.
When that's done go to the biggest car dealer in your area and apply for a sales job. Work the lot for a few weeks. Meet a few folks. It will get you back to the grass roots of what you have been doing and why you've been doing it. Your mojo will be back in a few weeks and then, as before, the sky is the limit.