Had...

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"Jesus said: I have cast fire upon the world, and behold I guard it until it is ablaze."
Gospel of Thomas

Had what?

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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"

A record.

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Are we still supposed to ignore that? Just wondering.

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Client: In six days, do you hear me, six days, God made the world. And you are not bloody well capable of making me a pair of trousers in three months!
Tailor: But my dear Sir, my dear Sir, look at the world, and look at my trousers.
(Beckett)

Yes, I've been ignoring it for quite a while. But I just couldn't resist today. It's so fascinating.

Same with me... I was just wondering what it was !!!

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Man has survived hitherto because he was too ignorant to know how to realize his wishes. Now that he can realize them, he must either change them or perish. William Carlos Williams (1883-1963)

what what is? (Is this proper sentence structure? How else could you say it?)

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Only a liberal would know how hard it is to get a nicotine patch to stick to a monkey.

It!

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Everyone has an opinion.


Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road...

DR. PHIL:
The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on "THIS" side of the road before it goes after the problem on the "OTHER SIDE" of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his "CURRENT" problems before adding "NEW" problems.

OPRAH:

Well I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls,which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.


GEORGE W. BUSH:
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.


DONALD RUMSFELD:
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.


ANDERSON COOPER/CNN:
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY:
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am for it now, and will remain against it.


JUDGE JUDY:

That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.


PAT BUCHANAN:

To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.


MARTHA STEWART:

No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level.


DRSEUSS:

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.


ERNEST HEMINGWAY:

To die in the rain. Alone.


JERRY FALWELL:

Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's why they call it the "other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as
plain and simple as that!


GRANDPA:

In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.


BARBARA WALTERS:

Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.


JOHN LENNON:

Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in peace.


ARISTOTLE:

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.


BILL GATES:

I have just released eChicken2006,which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken. The Platformis much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^( C \..... reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:

Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?


BILL CLINTON:

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?


AL GORE:

I invented the chicken!


COLONEL SANDERS:
Did I miss one?

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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"

Me John, big tree.

Mrs. M - I am stealing that.

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"You know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you would do for a Klondike bar." - Unknown

"What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad." - Dave Barry

This is a post about redundancy and useless repetition.

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Client: In six days, do you hear me, six days, God made the world. And you are not bloody well capable of making me a pair of trousers in three months!
Tailor: But my dear Sir, my dear Sir, look at the world, and look at my trousers.
(Beckett)

Guys, I'm bored.

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Client: In six days, do you hear me, six days, God made the world. And you are not bloody well capable of making me a pair of trousers in three months!
Tailor: But my dear Sir, my dear Sir, look at the world, and look at my trousers.
(Beckett)

holyshit...this thread has been going for over two years now, lol.

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"You know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you would do for a Klondike bar." - Unknown

"What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad." - Dave Barry

LOL I just went back to the first page and Ben was still known as "gtbecbp"!!!!!! I still think this thread has something to do with a conspiracy though.

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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"