This should be in the jokes area but it contains too much truth IMO.

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Anyone who thinks freedom comes cheap, please put the blindfold on and stand against the wall.

Many times I believe Americans will have to take back the country and start a new government.

Well, I guess it's a good thing that grasshoppers aren't allowed to vote.

Wouldn't Kermit have eaten the grasshopper?

Grasshopper always wrong in argument with chicken. In argument with ant... well, that grasshopper certainly isn't the prodigal grasshopper, is he?

In my version, Dick Cheney uses eminent domain to seize the ant's house (because it's sitting on an oil field), while Bush send both the ant and the grasshopper to die in the Iraqi desert.

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There is, of course, a problem with both sides of a dialogue. I just think the grasshopper's pretty cool.

Just wondering: does the ant have a big-screen television?

Actually, thinking about it, frame it like this:

The ant is working his butt off for ages to get enough food to live. Stupid grasshopper keeps messing about on his grasshopper-guitar making art or something. The ant ends up making way, way more food than he needs, so he uses it to buy loads of cool stuff. The grasshopper says, 'sorry to ask and all, but couldn't you sell some of that cool stuff so I don't die in the winter?'. Ant says, 'Sorry, sucks to be you'.

"... but I will give you a job shovelling the snow off my driveway. The job's not really worth enough to keep a grashopper alive, but I'll pay you that much anyway so you don't freeze."

From there, it depends on which kind of grashopper you have:

Artsy grasshopper: Takes the job, but complains about how "'The Ant' is oppressing him and keeping him down."

Hobo Grasshopper pt1: Complains how having to actually Work for his food is insulting, becomes homeless, freezes, and the media calls the ant mean-spirited.

Hobo Grasshopper pt2: A Mexican beetle hears about the job offer, sneaks into the country, works hard, lives cheaply, and prospers. Other grasshoppers complain about beetles taking all their jobs.

Litigious Grasshopper: Takes the job. Slips and falls during his daily complaining fit about how mean the ant is, sues, and gets most or all of the ant's stuff. The remainder is like the OP.

Enlightened Grasshopper: Takes the job, figures out the error of his ways, and hires a bunch of Mexican beetles to scoop other bugs' driveways, and becomes richer than the ant. Other grasshoppers call him a sell-out, but still want his stuff.

Any other Grasshoppers I'm forgetting?

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Today's forecast: Government corruption.

Tomorrow's forecast: 100% chance of more 'politics as usual'

Maybe it's finally time to vote Libertarian

You now suggest that your fictional ant is willing to pay the grasshopper enough to keep him alive, partly out of charity, since the market would not support such a wage. I have no particular issue with this, if we remember the grasshopper's previously mentioned laziness. Indeed, if everything always worked like that it'd be pretty damn handy.



Grasshopper Grasshopper, who is probably a mixture of many things, some of which fall loosely into the above categories, some of which don't.

For example, I write poetry, I have a master's degree in it, but I am also the best salesperson in the computer store where I work, which would make me, I suppose, 'artsy grasshopper' as well as another hereforto undisclosed category of insect. Due to a combination of problems, partly because of visa issues surrounding my US citizen girlfriend's eligability to work, partly due to my non-confrontational nature and a greedy, short-sighted general manager who -- while it is generally recognised that I am not only the best, but one of the most hard working people in my current employment -- will definately never give me a raise unless I threaten to leave (I've had to do that once already and it led to quite a sour atmosphere for couple of months), and partly because I am both attached to the many lovely people that I work with and generally somewhat apprehensive of sudden changes (this is a character flaw which I readily admit to), I am paid less that I can reasonably survive on.

I do not want any sympathy for my situation. It is not currently my nature to cry 'poor me,' and beyond that, my parents help out where they can. However, it is an example of two things:

1. Real people don't fit wonderfully easily into linguistic boxes.

and

2. Sometimes the way of the world is that effort and ability take a back-seat to ruthlessness. (note, sometimes it is also the way of the world that hard-working people are rewarded: the world is a magnificently random place).

On a slightly tangential note, I'm wondering why you believe that hiring Mexican beetles is enlightened? Isn't your main point that it is important to be responsible for yourself, not get others to be responsible on your behalf? Or is self-responsibility about something other than personal hard-work? How would you define it?

I also agree that complaining about hard-working people from across the border stealing your jobs is a little dumb: as long as a country isn't massively overcrowded I really don't see a problem.

The insect world is far more complex than this.

You have much to learn, Grasshopper.

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No, no, no, you don't understand. There are grasshoppers and there are ants. That's it. A colony of ants can strip the flesh off a grasshopper in seconds. A grasshopper is pretty damn good at jumping though. Who will win in this epic battle!?

I knew people would have fun with this...

Anyway, there are far too many grasshoppers in the world.....It is time for them to stand on their own back legs and hop to work and self-reliance.

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Anyone who thinks freedom comes cheap, please put the blindfold on and stand against the wall.

Many times I believe Americans will have to take back the country and start a new government.

How would you define 'self-reliance' in light of the problems highlighted thus far, namely either:

1. The preventable death of the grasshopper.

2. Does delegation equal self-reliance?

Well I guess if the grasshopper would stop relying on others to support it and do a good days worth of work, it wouldn't need to worry about dieing.

And that is the problem with todays society, people are relying on the government and others far to much. People bitch about big government but the people relying on it are growing in numbers. Get them the fuck off their fat asses and make them work is what needs to be done.

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Anyone who thinks freedom comes cheap, please put the blindfold on and stand against the wall.

Many times I believe Americans will have to take back the country and start a new government.